Safeguarding Your Progress: How to Handle Setbacks
Building a new morning routine is not a linear process. There will be sick days, travel, stressful weeks, and mornings when you simply forget. The difference between someone who succeeds and someone who gives up is not that the successful person never fails; it’s how they respond to that failure. A robust system of habit building must include a plan for when things go wrong.
Plan for Relapse: The “If-Then” Strategy
Life is unpredictable. Instead of hoping disruptions won’t happen, plan for them. This is known as “if-then planning” or “implementation intentions.” You create a specific plan for how you’ll handle a potential obstacle before it occurs. This pre-decision making saves you from having to rely on in-the-moment willpower when you’re already tired or stressed.
Here are some examples:
- If I wake up late and only have 5 minutes, then I will just drink my glass of water and take three deep breaths.
- If I am traveling and staying in a hotel, then I will do my one minute of stretching on the floor as soon as my feet touch the ground.
- If I feel too sick to do my routine, then my only job is to rest, and I will resume my MVA tomorrow without guilt.
By having a plan, a missed day doesn’t become a catastrophe. It’s just a planned deviation. You followed the plan for that specific scenario, which is a success in itself.
Beware the “All-or-Nothing” Trap of Streak Psychology
Tracking your streak—the number of consecutive days you’ve performed a habit—can be incredibly motivating. Seeing that number climb from 7 to 30 to 100 days provides a powerful sense of reward and progress. However, it has a dark side: the all-or-nothing mindset. When you inevitably miss a day, the broken streak can feel so devastating that it leads to complete abandonment of the habit. “I’ve already ruined it,” you might think, “so what’s the point of starting again?”
The solution is to reframe the goal. The goal is not a perfect, unbroken streak. The goal is a high percentage of success and a quick recovery from failure. This is where the most important rule of habit building comes in: never miss twice.
Missing one day is an accident. It’s part of life. Missing two days in a row is the start of a new, undesirable habit. Your entire focus after a missed day should be on getting back on track the very next day, no matter how small the action. Did you miss your morning stretch today? Fine. Tomorrow, your only priority is to do it, even if it’s for just 30 seconds. This builds the critical identity of someone who is resilient, not someone who is perfect.
Resetting Without Shame
Shame is the enemy of progress. When you miss a day, your inner critic might pipe up with accusations of being lazy, undisciplined, or a failure. This internal narrative is not helpful; in fact, it’s counterproductive. It drains your energy and motivation, making it even harder to start again.
Instead, practice self-compassion. Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend who is trying their best. Acknowledge the misstep without judgment. Say to yourself, “Okay, that didn’t happen today. It’s not ideal, but it’s okay. I am a person who gets back on track.” Analyze what went wrong with curiosity, not criticism. Was the friction too high? Did an unexpected event derail you? Use the information as data to improve your system. Maybe your MVA is still too large, or you need a better “if-then” plan. Every setback is an opportunity to learn and refine your approach. Remember, consistency is not about perfection. It’s about returning, again and again, to the practice.
